NEW YORK CITY — September 6, 2007 2:34 P.M.
Random ten-year-old at Woodward: “Is this going to be on YouTube or something?”
Watermelon Alex: Hell no, Sanchez only, bitch.”
The official version of the best east coast video in the past fifty years recently arrived after the majority of its post-production was done in India in between giving beer cans to monkeys and chasing Indian girls.
This DVD has the best menu in the history of DVD menus, the original 24 minute video, and four bonus features. The main bonus section is 42 minutes long, and basically the sketchier version of the video in itself, with a soundtrack that ranges from Parliament to Party Alarm to the dancehall remix of “Soul Survivor.” There is also a Woodward section, featuring Watermelon Alex, Jon Newport, Brian Brown and Lurker Lou breaking into parks and hopping gaps with BMX bikes, hustling popsicles to twelve year olds, and getting young kids to say obscene things. I happen to have a pretty strong suspicion that Alex was drunk during the entire time at Woodward. The other two sections are a Mexico section and a Ghana section that don’t make that much sense, but are amazing in their own right.
The video itself features full parts from Alex Mosley, who skates in Jordans for his entire part, Steve Marino, Little Chris (the best skater on the face of the earth), Jose Pereyra, Lurker Lou, Brian Brown, Doug Brown, Jake Johnson, and Ben Nazario. Ben’s part is better than every Marc Johnson part in the past ten years. Also features tons of cameos from your favorite Quarter Snacks assholes.
So, essentially… a 24 minute video + a 42 minute bonus section + a 9 minute Woodward section + a 3 minute Ghana feature + a 4 minute Mexico feature = almost an hour and a half of brilliance, in addition to an overload of spots that are going to send certain local message boards ablaze with location questions.
Available late September 2008, for $10 at most local shops and on Quarter Snacks. You can find the trailer here, but honestly, it does no justice to the unbridled brilliance of this video.
And here are some screenshots…
